Because our anniversary is coming up, and because I was inspired by another's idea, I've decided to help everyone get to know Jared a little better. This is an incredibly long post, so please be warned. Yes, I did come up with 101 things about Jared, and I know as soon as I post this I'll come up with more that are better, but we'll just have to save those for next year! Jared has already seen all these and had line-item veto power (which he did not exercise.) Hopefully you will learn a few things about Jared and why I love him so much!
1. He got a 33 on his ACT and was really disappointed with himself. He wanted a 36.
2. He constantly asks me questions, for which I could not possibly know the answers. For instance “what’s going to happen now?” in a movie neither of us has seen.
3. Jared says the first time he thought I was cute it was because of the shoes I was wearing.
4. He won’t let me throw those ratty old shoes out. He even had his sister mail them back to us when I left them at her house accidentally. (so embarrassing)
5. He sets two alarms with no real intention of getting up to the first one.
6. Jared will randomly ask “Guess what?” and honestly expect you to guess until you get it right. (Or until you roll your eyes like I do. Then you get hints!)
7. The first time Jared held my hand was also the same time he kissed me for the first time. Fast mover!
8. He had never dated a girl that he had kissed first. They always kissed him first. (except me.)
9. If Jared ever hears a word he doesn’t know on TV or reads it somewhere, he does not rest until he understands it, knows who discovered it, it’s etymology and then tells me all about it, no matter what it is.
10. This makes Wikipedia one of his favorite things.
11. Jared is a compulsive flosser.
12. He always says our son is so cute he wants “to eat him!” So after playtime with Daddy, I always count fingers and toes…
13. For Jared, the calming affect of spreadsheets is really something to behold.
14. Jared catches his second wind at about 10:30 pm.
15.This is usually the time of night he decides to rearrange the kitchen or clean our bathroom top to bottom. I used to fight it, but then I realized – what am I doing?
16. When Will was born, I had a C-section, and so was out cold for his first few hours of life. Jared held William and was so sweet during this time.
17.When I woke up, he introduced us.
18. He had a spotless car until he met me. When we were in the same singles ward, I spilled 5 gallons of hot chocolate in his car. Then after we were married I turned his car into a very big, very messy purse. He never once complained either time.
19. He loves backpacking, and loves mountains and misses them both.
20. He looks good in everything he wears. No matter what it is.
21. Jared uses a Dvorak keyboard. Enough said there.
22. He has a fake laugh and a real laugh. He is sincere in both instances, but his fake laugh is more for your benefit and his real laugh is one he can’t hold in.
23. He was a totally by-the-book missionary who knew that you had to be by-the-book to work with-the-Spirit.
24. Jared will search for days to get the best deal to save a few dollars. Awesome sometimes, less awesome other times.
25. He doesn’t like sandwiches. He’d rather have 4 day old leftovers than a sandwich.
26. Before we were dating, the first time I cooked for Jared he didn’t like it.
27. Jared made us eat with plastic cutlery for 2 months while we searched for the “perfect” flatware.
28. Jared is a fantastic cook, with the patience and forethought to make things taste so good.
29. He hates commercials of any kind.
30. Jared saves me from bugs of all kinds. (although I think deep down he really doesn’t like crickets.)
31. He always thanks me for “letting him” do things or buy things. I think it’s his way of saying thank you, but I think people who hear him say it feel sorry for him that he’s married to such a controlling hag.
32. His eyesight is terrible.
33. I think he secretly acts like he likes Harry Potter just so I’ll read him the books. It is a cheap date after all!
31.When Jared is asleep, he is OUT. I mean have a full conversation with me he doesn’t remember and saying hilarious things that make no sense. Just a note to never to trust him with secrets of national security.
32. He loves The Office, Flight of the Conchords, and anything to do with NASA.
33. To this day he doesn’t like the way my engagement ring turned out, even though I love it.
34. Jared’s spanish is terrific.
35. He doesn’t like to spend money on himself but he’ll always spend it on me.
36. He has a patch of white hair on the back of his head. It appeared there sometime after his mission.
37. He loves Dave Matthews Band.
38. He is a great big brother.
39. Jared always has to remind me to take the lint out of the lint catcher on the dryer. He always reminds me what a fire hazard it is.
40. He loves it when I scratch his back.
41. He has a picture of me when I was three and a half and he keeps it in his scriptures.
42. Jared thinks our first date was to Panda Express.
43. Just when I want to snuggle up to Jared at night, he rolls over on his stomach and I get an elbow in the face.
44. After we were married, we used crystal wine goblets for 2 months while Jared looked for the perfect glasses. You haven’t had milk, til you’ve had it from crystal.
45. Because I never use them, Jared steals my hair products like gel and mousse to get the GQ look he’s got.
46. Jared always believes me.
47. He always stacks the silverware neatly in the drawer.
48. Jared is the world’s best photo red-eye reducer.
49. Whenever Jared gets a sinus headache, he is convinced he has cavities and proceeds to check his teeth out in the mirror all afternoon.
50. Jared likes it when I call him “sugar.”
51. Jared beats me in anything we do. Board games, computer games… even if he’s never played it before.
52. Almost every time Jared does the laundry, he shrinks my shirts. I think he does it on purpose so he doesn’t have to do laundry.
53. Sometimes he compliments me, like “Oh, honey, you (whatever) so well. It’s the best.” So that I will do it in the future and he won’t have to. I fell for that in the beginning. Not anymore.
54. He keeps the free envelopes you get with bills to use them for other things.
55. He’s never actually mailed anything in one.
56. He’s a great tipper.
57. Jared is left handed.
58. He has a Mac.
59. When Jared was in high school, he was voted best male vocal talent.
60. He was also in the seminary student council. (that’s a big deal in Boise I guess)
61. His Eagle project was to build a softball field by a church building.
62. When he was little, he used to build speakers.
63. When we were dating (that whole day and half) Jared’s level of PDA was a little too high for me. Apparently I got over it.
64. Jared always acts like he’s not ticklish, just annoyed if I try. But sometimes when I catch him by surprise, you can tell he’s WAY ticklish.
65. He still has his first library card.
66. Jared is always nice to my friends.
67. Jared cannot leave the house without his phone, his keys, and his wallet. Even if he’s just going to go get the mail.
68. In high school, Jared owned his own business.
69. Even though Jared grew up in the mountains, he’s never been skiing.
70. He always corrects my grammar.
71. Jared said I looked pretty even when I was pregnant and the size of a Buick.
72. Jared always helps me put Will to sleep at night.
73. He also lets me sleep in on Saturdays by taking care of Will.
74. When he was little, he wanted to be a fighter pilot.
75. He loves rock climbing.
76. Jared is the most easily side-tracked person I’ve ever met. If I lose eye contact…. It’s over.
77. He loves buying me jewelry.
78. Jared uses Fantastik for far more things than it was intended. He uses it as insecticide, dishwashing liquid and disinfectant.
79. Jared has every piece of electronic connector cord ever.
80. I think Jared could easily consume his body weight in strawberry go-gurt.
81. He worked at the MTC for a few years in college.
82. Jared has a 5 o’clock shadow at 1 in the afternoon.
83. He also cuts his fingernails almost every night.
84. Jared didn’t get to cut the cord when William was born. The C-section meant it wasn’t necessary.
85. In college, Jared lived on toast and cereal. (And not because he wasn’t taught to cook. I’ve got your back Lori!)
86. Jared has unflattering nicknames for ex-girlfriends so he would remember it was awful and not want to get back together with them.
87. Jared has a scar on his finger that he tells everyone he got in a knife fight.
88. They never believe him.
89. It’s true.
90. Whenever I’m sick, I’m always glad Jared’s around to take care of me.
91. Sometimes Jared makes lists, just because he knows I like them.
92. He passed his crooked smile on to his son. (and I couldn’t be happier!)
93. Jared loves waterfalls.
94. He can play anything on the piano.
95. He likes to slow dance in the kitchen.
96. When we were working in the nursery, the kids thought we were both named Sis. Roberts.
97. Jared changed Will’s first diaper.
98. He doesn’t fold his pants. He hangs them on hooks.
99. When Jared has spaced out and stopped listening when we’re talking, he asks a random question that he thinks will make it look like he was still paying attention. It doesn’t work.
100. Jared’s wedding ring is the coolest tungsten ring I’ve ever seen.
101. He’s a good dad, a great husband, and the best friend.
I also wanted to mention in passing that Will turned 9 months old over the Thanksgiving holiday and then went to the doctor the next week. He is 28.5 inches long, 21.25 pounds. I know that sounds like he's shrinking, but apparently they didn't measure him right last time. The doctor also listened politely to our pleas for something to do about his still not sleeping through the night, then our prayers were answered when he realized that Will probably has acid reflux. So he's on Prevacid and is a much happier baby I think.
